Angela and Nathan were newly engaged and shopping for wedding bands when she got the call on November 18th. Her 7-year-old nephew, James, was being removed from his latest foster home. While Angela and Nathan had met James and were hoping to take him in, this was a moment of decisive action.
“There was no hesitation really,” Angela said. “I had to go into the jewelry store and ask Nathan if he was ready to be a dad that day. We didn’t hesitate.”
They drove two hours to Statesville to pick him up from the former foster parent’s home, frantically calling everyone they could to prepare for the arrival of their new son.
James had been in foster care for two years already, but her half-sister had not met the social services’ requirements to regain custody and her rights were being terminated. While Angela and Nathan had been in talks with social services, and had met James a couple of times before, this was to be the pivotal moment. One week before Thanksgiving, they became a family.
Nathan had been employed as Kinship Navigator by HCC just a couple of months before they got custody of James, which was to become a blessing to their small family. “I had been helping grandparents with issues that came up, so I wasn’t completely in the dark, but there is a substantial difference when it is happening to your family,” said Nathan. “We had hoped James’ transition to our home was going to be a bit smoother, but we had to adapt immediately. HCC was there every step of the way for us.”
Nathan said that Jacob Willis, Executive Director of HCC, was extremely supportive of the situation and offered anything he could to assist us in the transition. Nathan and Angela had been preparing for James’ arrival at the end of December, so some things were in place. They had decorated a room in their home for him and started purchasing toys for him to play with when he came to visit on previous weekends. “We had almost everything we needed, but the legal, logistical, and emotional needs were immense,” said Angela.
Nathan and Angela were fortunate to be able to afford to buy new clothes, furniture, and toys; but many grandparents and other caregivers don’t have that luxury. “I can’t imagine being retired or on disability and facing this,” said Nathan. “It’s been a struggle, even with a good income. HCC has been awesome in offering to help us in every possible way.”
For them, the support group meetings and activities have been the most important part of being involved with HCC. James looks forward to playing with and connecting to other kids like him.
“Many of the kids in his school don’t quite understand his situation,” said Angela. “They hear him calling us Uncle Nathan and Aunt Angela and think it’s strange. The reality of hearing other kids call their grandparents and other caregivers mom and dad made it okay for him to accept us as parents.”
Nathan and Angela are still working hard to make a good life for James. They recently bought a home in Ashe County and got married in June. James was their ring bearer. “He was so cute in his little suit,” said Angela. “I think the wedding helped cement him as an important member of our family.” They plan to adopt James in the next couple of months and these steps are an essential part of that process. HCC has helped them renew their faith in the community and they hope that they will be able to help James reach his fullest potential in a peaceful and beautiful home.